So we're back

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I was trying to wait until the lab results came in to update, but it looks like it may take a few more days.

We are back from Children's Hospital, and I'm sure glad the surgery is over. It is so scary to see your child go under, especially for a wimp like me...

They didn't find anything in her throat, but they did say her esophagus was 'white and mucous-y'...so they took a biopsy. We are now waiting on those results, although I hope and pray that it is nothing.

Of course, now that she knows how worried I have been, and am, about her, she is acting like a little shit. She refuses to eat anything she doesn't like, and then blames it on her 'choking feeling'. LOL, it's funny and frustrating at the same time. Right now I'm catering to her though, as I wait for the results... she has lost quite a bit of weight, so I don't mind giving her only food she likes for the time being, so she can gain it back.

As far as the gluten free/ wheat free/ caseine free diet goes, we're doing alright... there are a lot of crazy products out there made out of who knows what that he can actually eat. Tonight he had 'rice-cream' and loved it :-)

In other news, my job is going okay, tax season (I work in the property tax department) is coming up, and people are starting to act like real shits. Always complaining and fighting about the taxes. Look people, I don't set the tax rate okay?!!!  Jeeez.

Oh, and one more random thing that pissed me off this week:  JP is a manager of his business, and he is totally different in his people skills than me. I am more intense and bossy, and he is relaxed and down to earth.  The problem is that sometimes, not often, people he works with forget that he's the one in charge. Example: We go into the business over the weekend, and one of the girls working there starting talking to him like he was the new kid in town.  

At one point she started arguing about a price with him, and she said 'you dipshit' to him. My mouth flew open and I couldn't believe it. I walked out of the store because I was furious and he stayed to finish the conversation with her. Back in the car, he said that the girl was just pissed off about something, and that he wasn't sure why she was so mad. I told him he needed to write her up for being insubordinate to him, but he thinks I'm over-reacting. 

In the end, he said he'd talk to her tomorrow, when she is in again, but I think he should have sent her home then and there.

I guess that is why his workers love him and would hate me as a boss... I'd put soap in their mouths, I swear I would!

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Gluten Free Wheat Free Casein Free -- Taste Free?

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I never knew how many things contained gluten, wheat or casein.

Even vanilla extract has gluten (in the alcohol)... who knew? 

Now that my boy has been put on this special diet due to some severe allergies (which we also didn't know about until recently) we are sure learning a lot of these.

What I've found is that nothing is what it seems, that even Rice Krispies Cereal can contain gluten or casein (which is any dairy product) unless you get a specific brand.  

Whole Foods is our new grocery store of choice as well as Applegate Farms. Which sucks, since I have to cross the border into the USA once a week, to buy all this stuff. That's right, apparantly us canadians don't have these products readily available. Sigh.

By the way, if anyone has any experience with gluten/wheat/caseine free recipes, please let me know... I'd love to learn some.

As if this wasn't enough, tomorrow morning my daughter has to go to Children's hospital to get a procedure done, where she will be put completely under, and they'll go into her esophagus with a camera all the way to her stomach. She's been having a 'choking feeling' now for 10 days and lost 4 pounds already from not eating.

Intervention is clearly needed, they'll go see if there is something there. IF there isn't they'll take a biopsy and see if there is anything wrong with the esophagus.

If you pray, keep us in mind, if you don't ~ think positive thoughts okay? 

SIN CITY

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Just stepped off the plane a few short hours ago, and boy do I have stuff to tell you!

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THE GOOD

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We stayed at the Luxor hotel, right on the Vegas Strip. Before we got there, everyone we knew mentioned this "$20 upgrade trick" where you stick a crisp $20 bill in between your drivers license and your credit card as you're checking in and then ask for a room upgrade. Apparently this tricks works quite well. We decided we were too chicken to try it, but we did ask if there were any 'complementary' upgrades available. She said there were, so we did get upgraded after all, for free. From queen to king and from shower to shower and bath.

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Not too shabby, right?

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The other hotels we visited on the strip were just as amazing, and some even more so than others. The Venetian hotel was my favorite, it had the canals running through it. These hotels just ooze Luxury. 

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Really, they ooze it.

   

This is our hotel, at night. Gorgeous, right? And the other one was JP's favorite, the Bellagio.

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We also took a bus tour to the Grand Canyon and Hoover Dam. That was probably the best money we spent on this trip. The scenery at the Grand Canyon was out of this world. If you ever go to Vegas, I highly recommend you stop by the Grand Canyon. 

.

... 

Grand Canyon was breathtaking, it really was.

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And of course, last but not least on my list of "GOOD" was the M&M shop that is located right on the strip. M&M candy. An entire shop dedicated to just M&M candy and M&M paraphernalia. The shop had 4 floors people!!

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I could have spent all day there, really I totally could have. They had clothes, and toys and stuffies and lunch boxes and watches and leather jackets and bedding ~~ practically anything that you can imagine, with the M&M logos all over it. How cool is THAT? 

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But the best part, was the wall with 22 different colours of M&M's. Yup, 22 colours of M&M's. Betcha you didn't even know M&M's had 22 colours. Neither did I. But there it stood, in all its glory. And we could sample some for free!  Yummy.

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I ended up buying one of those miniature gum ball machine dispensers, with M&M logos on it, that you can just twist the latch and M&M come out. It's like magic, you don't even need coins. I heart it. It's going on my desk at work tomorrow.

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Are you totally salivating all over your screen? I still am. How cool is this?!

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THE BAD

Of course I'm gonna bitch about things too, after all you want my real opinion not just some travel brochure bull shit right? Well let me tell you about the sleezy side of Vegas. 

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One word. 

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Flickers.

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These are non english speaking men and women, whose whole job is to stand about 10 feet apart from the other flicker that you've just passed, and 'flick' pornography at you. I say pornography and it sounds harsh, but it is in fact that.

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They are aligned all throughout the Strip and they have what seems like hundreds of these cards on them. (they have an apron on and these are stuffed in there). At first, they look like playing cards, they're the same size, but when you actually take one, you see that there are naked women on them - with the nipples starred out so you can't actually claim they're naked.

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At first I thought it was weird, but then as we walked 10 more steps and 10 more steps it became rude, and then annoying and then just too much. The thing that bugged me about these 'flickers' is their persistence. It didn't matter to them if you were man, woman or child, they didn't discriminate against anyone. 

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Everyone got flicked.

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Sometimes they walk a couple of steps towards you or behind you as you walk by, to make sure that they give you one of these cards. I seriously felt as annoyed as I did when I was running away from the kids selling chicklets in Mexico, but just less bad.

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What inevitably happens is that everyone throws their 'cards' away once they see what they are, and then the entire sidewalk has a light dusting of porn on it as you are walking by.

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Lovely.

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By the end of the day I felt a little dirty and in need of a shower.

THE UGLY

By far the ugliest most annoying thing I found about Vegas was the drunks. Now don't go sending me hatemail, I know what it's like to be drunk. 

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But as I haven't been drunk in a while, I guess it's not that funny when you're the only sober one there. 

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Here's what bugged me most about it. It wasn't only college kids (of which there were lots, since it was SPRING BREAK) but 40 somethings and 50 somethings that were falling all over themselves at every corner.

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It was especially moving to witness a mother and daughter bonding moment while they took turns holding each other's hair while the other one puked in the trash. And I must share the story of the pretty girl in the blue dress who was just too wasted to notice that one of her boobs had popped out of her dress, so she just kept walking anyway.

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I also wish I had taken at least one picture of the 4 brides we saw walking (at separate times) on the strip, barefoot with shoes in one hand and an open beer in another.  Now don't get me wrong, getting married in Vegas sounds beautiful, gorgeous setting and beautiful weather. 

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But when you've got a cigarette hanging out of your mouth while you're cursing at your new husband across the street, I think you've just lost the title of a 'blushing bride'. 

More like Bridezilla.

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Do you NEED enough alcohol to fill up an entire guitar?

And what is up with the slutty clothes that EVERY SINGLE FEMALE who worked there has to wear?

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 Seriously! 

Even the senior citizen who was working in the casino serving drinks had a tiny itty bitty blue half dress on with tassels sticking out. 

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Do we really need to see this shit?

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Between the whole Flickers scenario, and the boobies everywhere, and the 'costumes' the ladies wore, and the buses with the big "HOT BABES TO YOU" advertising and of course their sleazy motto "What happens in Vegas stays in Vegas", I found myself feeling more than a little dirty. 

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Maybe if I'd been drunk I wouldn't have noticed all that, but since I wasn't- I did notice it, and it left a yucky after taste in my mouth that even those 22 colours of M&Ms can't get out.

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All in all I'm glad I went and saw it for myself.  

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It is definitely a place like no other.

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Vegas BABY!

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In about 2 hours I will be boarding a plane to Vegas! 

That's right Lady Luck has smiled 

upon us and we managed to get a good deal...

It's our first time going there and we're excited. Not big gamblers, and we don't drink (yawn, right?) but at least we like shopping!!

Of course, I'm a bit apprehensive leaving my kids behind, since I hate flying and I always imagine the worst case scenario, but once we land, I will be relaxed in the sun.

I've read it's supposed to be 27 degrees out there (that's 85 for you Farenheit speaking folks)

That's hot! Especially compared to me typing this while wearing my parka!

So, we're off til wednesday... hope to be taking lots of cool pictures to share with you when we come back!!

Oh and if you have any good tips, especially about upgrades and free stuff, do share! I'm gonna be checking my emails from our hotel :-)

I can't believe you're still here

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Seriously!

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 You came back to check if there was a new post, expecting the same old Bahamas heading, didn't ya?

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Well I am full of surprises.

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I don't want my posts to be few and far between, like some of you have been complaining about *ahem, Karen* but I also can't really blog like I used to. 

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You know how lovely this past September has been for me, right? (think back people, it's not that long ago - remember my drama?) Well, one would assume I'd have moved on since then, forgive and forget, that sort of thing. One would assume that since it's March, September would be all but forgotten.

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Well, one would be wrong.  Now yes, we've moved on since then, and are rebuilding. But the trouble is that I am constantly looking back at the pre-september life and wonder how I could have been so wrong about someone who I thought I knew so well?  

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Yes, I have since forgiven the incident, but I can't for the life of me look at this person the same way. You tell me, in all honesty how you can block such a betrayal out of your mind? I know some of your personal stories, and there are some readers out there that have overcome far worse betrayals and have gone on to have happy relationships.

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I am not complaining, things are actually good. He's been trying his best to get back into my good graces ever since he's come back. I've been seeing a shrink since September as well, so I am definitely healing. But somewhere, somehow, during this big jolt - my rose coloured (I'm canadian ~ it's supposed to have the "u" there!) glasses got knocked off.

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I have tried to put them back on, readjust them, strap tape to them if necessary, but the darn things just won't stay on! I see things differently now, and that makes me sad.

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It's not necessarily bad, but I feel so jaded when I look around now. I think it's sad that we can love someone with our whole heart and build a home with them, and with one careless act, our entire sense of worth is in question.  

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In the end, I guess the lesson is supposed to be "rely on yourself"! 

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This is the part that I feel sounds jaded, when I say that when push comes to shove only you can ever truly take care of you... I never used to feel that way. I used to think 'together all is possible'.  It's not a bad thing at all that it's changed for me, in fact in many ways I like who I am now way more than pre-September. I am more self assured, more independent, more confident and just more comfortable being on my own. 

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I even have my very own friends now. *Gasp!*  Can you believe it?

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That'll teach you about complaining about my lack of writing , won't it?  Hehehe....

Bahamas here we come!

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This is the phone call I got at work today: 

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"Babe, I won a trip to the Bahamas!"

 Me: "Say what?"

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"Yeah, they just called and I got a free trip to the Bahamas"  

Me: "Who called?"

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  "Majestic ~ they pay for everything, except for the flight there. They need our credit card number for that."

Me: "Hold on a sec, they said you won a trip and then they asked you if you had a credit card?"

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"Yeah, why?"

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I used to wonder WHO falls for these type of scams.

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 Now I get to sit beside him on the couch every night.

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This is good for me?!

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New year's resolutions and all that... someone finally convinced me to take up Pilates. Not that this is a new phase or anything, I know it's been the "cool thing to do" for a while now.

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After all, it's all the rage for the Sex and the City stars, so it must be THE workout to try. I have been hearing the same advertisement coming out of people's mouths: "It elongates the muscles, it lengthens the muscle, you get a lean long muscle...bla bla bla"

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Enough already. When my work decided to throw a Pilates class pro bono in our lunch hour, I thought I may as well try it.

.

Let me be the first to tell you, Pilates sucks! 

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There's absolutely no grace to doing Pilates. I see these women in infomercials - smiling from ear to ear as they effortlessly hold their pose. 

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 Nobody informed me that Pilates moves at the speed of snails going backwards. That's right. Everything is in slow motion. It should be for senior citizens only. 

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Except for that other part that no one informed me about: Pilates is really tough!

 I'm no biker chick, but I thought I could tough out one class of working out. Turns out I was wrong. Holding those crazy poses, for what seems like forever makes me sweat and puff like the magic dragon himself. 

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Oh yeah, I totally took a beating. And the kicker ~~ After all this talk about elongating and lengthening muscles, I just checked, and it totally didn't work. I'm still 5'3". 

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So not going back.

Merry Xmas from us to you!

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Life has been hectic, no Christmas cards were sent this year... no presents have been bought yet .. so please excuse my lame blog as of late.

Hope you are all full of holiday spirit and you and your family enjoy this special time~

BLOGHER

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Who's heard of Blogher? It is something fairly new to me too.

Well, what do you know, each year in the summer there is a 2 day blogging conferrence (held in different cities each year).

Well next July it's being held in Chicago!! I totally want to go. I was talking to Laura, who's already gone once, and she loved it. There are seminars to attend so you can learn about how to write the type of material that people are drawn to, and how to improve things on your blog.

Not to mention meeting bloggers that you may or may not know in the blogworld. From all over the world!! (I can't think of a better opportunity than this)

As I was saying, I'd love to go, and I want to see who else would consider joining me? Seriously, 2 days (July 24th and 25th in Chicago...do I have to twist your arm?)

Let me know, and we can chat... there's lots to talk about, like room sharing, favorite beverages and other such important things, etc...

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19 days gone...

.

And I'm back to let you know that the hateful website - the one which all of you kindly flagged, has finally been (either forced, or willfully - doesn't matter) made private.

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Yeay I am so happy that I'm doing a happy snoopy dance around my living room!!

I know I've been gone long, but I know you understand, since I was working on my relationship.

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I am happy to report that things are going splendidly and we are awesome, in some ways better than before because now we know what the problems were and have fixed those.

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With Xmas coming fast and furious, how is everyone else holding up?

Have you started your Christmas shopping yet?

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Jp will be in Montreal next weekend, from thursday to monday - so I will have plenty of time for blogging... just giving you the heads up.

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In the meantime I'm driving a 'rental' Toyota Corrolla as my Yaris is getting a makeover. It's weird, but after driving a small tiny hatchback for so long, a Corrolla seems gi-normous.

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Missed you all and it's good to be back!

~~~~

Hey y'all!

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When I got out of the underground parking the other day - a new driver had a stop sign, waiting to get out of the parking lot and COMPLETLY ignored the stop sign... so this is what my car looks like now:

.

...

Nice, eh?

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My pretty little blue Yaris :=(

Let's move on

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It is almost Halloween after all... and now that we've had the spooky post below, let's have a fun one above it.

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Today at work, there was a pumpkin carving contest. Big deal, right? Yeah, that's what I thought too. Oh my gosh was I wrong! WOW

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Each department got into it and they were soo competitive. I've never seen anything like it. Now I didn't have a camera handy to take pictures of all the different departments, and because this was a raffle for charity, the pumpkins have already been 'won' by people so they are gone.

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But I do have some shots that I received via email from a co worker of a few of the departments... including the department who won the contest.

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Here's what we did all day at work, lol.

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First up:

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Finance Department

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They turned their pumpkin into Cinderella...glitter and everything on their pumpkin. How stinkin' cute is that? This was the first pumpkin on display, so it raised the bar. No one even thought about add-ons before this....lol

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Next up, came

Police Department

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Theirs was the most fun one. If you look closely you can see the half eaten doughnut and coffee on the car. And they are carrying a smaller pumpkin behind them (there is a sign on top marked 'paddy wagon', lol)

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Ours is the

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Tax Department

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We pretty much freaked out when we saw the other ones, as our department consists of 5 girls. Our idea of carving a pumpkin was cut out triangles and a mouth. So, we downloaded some 'easy clown mask pumpkin tips' from the internet and went to the dollar store to buy a carving kit on our break. Then, I called my dad and asked him to raid my daughter's toybox and bring me her Mr. Potato Head's arms so I could use them.

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I am not sure what the next one is really supposed to be:

.

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Community Services Department

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And the winner is

.

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.

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The Planning Department

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It's no wonder they deal with building permits and construction by-laws. I mean just LOOK at their work of art. This must have been planned for for a while. I mean, seriously, did they create blueprints for it? It was awesome. I even voted for it to win, even though I told the girls in Taxes that I voted for ours, tee hee.

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My only question is, for the people who won these pumpkins... I wonder how they took them home in one piece?

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I guess I'll find out tomorrow.

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You want spooky? Read this!

.

Okay so I am pissed.

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I spent about a week and a half thinking of what to do about this blog. As you all know, I went private for 2 weeks to privately mourn when JP left. Since he's come back and we're working things out, I wanted to make the blog un-private again.

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Then I saw a website that my lovely ex boyfriend put up about me. So I clammed up and quickly went private again, when I realized this person is STILL keeping such close tabs on me.

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I mean, seriously? You still read me? WTH?

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I am angry, freaked out and a bit disturbed by this. He has taken posts that i've written in the past, and spun his own interpretation of it on this web page. Never mind that he's taken something out of contest, or that it's not even true.

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Those of you who have read me for a while will remember these posts... after each post he claims something.

.

At first he claims I went private because I wanted to bad mouth my exhusband Richard. As you all know, (since you've read me for 2 years) that is not the case. I went private because this nutbar (still clearly) followed my life on the blog and I was uncomfortable with that.

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Then he claimed I lied about our wedding day. No I didn't. As you all remember, I got married in July and our pictures got lost. We re-did our pictures on our Alaskan cruise, which was in September. (Sept. 11 also happens to be the day we met, so we alwasy from the Alaskan cruise on have referred to that as our anniversary)

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Third he claims I bad mouthed JP for leaving me (which you ALL KNOW I DIDN'T) and he claims JP left me for a 'not keeping my legs closed'.... dumbass doesn't know what he's talking about.

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Lastly, (on a private blog that only a handful of people still read) I revealed that we were expecting. Obviously that wasn't meant to be, since we lost it are no longer pregnant. He pokes fun at that as well and claims I must have lied since the picture on my blog shows me thin.

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I have not retalliated, but I have contacted the municipal police department. I had filed a complaint with them before about him, about a year or so ago... so they have that on file. They told me that if I could prove he's lying and they can do something about it, because its slander.

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Now I have two lawyers (Dave and Karen) who read this blog... tell me what my options are here, as I'm getting really fed up of turning the other cheek.

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And now, after all that, here is the website (I am only showing you because I contacted Blogger and they said if enough people 'flag' his website they can take action against him as well.)

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http://www.jpandmichelle.blogspot.com/ *and yes, for those of you who remember, this was my original blog about how JP and I met, but I deleted it after this asshole found it... then he goes and re-instates it and writes this crap about me*

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You tell me, WHO DOES THAT?!

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And what should I do about this? Un-private-ize it so he can see that I'm exposing him? Or just keep staying private?

Speaking of odd..

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So I took my toyota to get serviced this weekend. All nice and good. When I went to get in and drive it home, I noticed that all my radio pre-sets were changed. WTF?

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WHO does that to a vehicle they service?

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I guess nobody likes country anymore...

~~~~~

I *heart* my new job.

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The benefits are amazing, we even get to use the gym on our one hour lunch break if we want to (for a nominal fee each pay period). And we get to park underground - for a nominal fee each pay period. We pay 6% of our pay to our pension plan each pay period (the govt matches our contribution), and (yes, you guessed it!!) for a nominal fee each pay period we also get to have cappucinos or all sorts of goodies delivered to our desks each day.

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(I can already FEEL me gain back all that weight I lost, haha)

.

However, by the time you add all these nominal fees all together, I figure I'll be bringing home about $5 every two weeks...

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SUPER!

You've got a social life? You must not have children!

"Mom - I've got a playdate with Cameron" my son informs me today.

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And I've got a playdate with Neeve" interrupts my daughter.

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My son wants to go to his friend's house. My daughter wants to have her friend come over to our house.

I quickly do a mental check and try and remember if I've cleaned up the dishes from this morning... yup, all clear.

.

Phew.

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Now I just gotta figure out a way to drop off my son and make it back to my place in time for my daughter's playdate. And then, of course, once that is over, race over to my son's friend and pick him up again.

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Did I mention I need to make dinner but instead I'm running around like a chaffeur?
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I spend more time making phone calls on behalf of my offspring, arranging and re-arranging playdates than any phone calls I make for my own social life.

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In fact, my big calendar on the fridge is colourfully marked with all their activities (my daughter has Sparks and Art and my son has Karate twice a week) as well as playdates.

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The other day I was trying to schedule some alone time for me and my husband, and I had to 'fit it in' between all the children's activities!!

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Who knew 8 and 6 year olds could have a more active social life than their 35 year old parents?

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Dear Jerk behind me in line at the grocery store

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If my children hadn't been with me today, I would've decked you. Right in front of all those witnesses.

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I know that you were quite vocal in your displeasure with my son today, and I congratulate you about not only embarrassing yourself and us, but about making a little 8 year old boy feel truly humiliated.
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You see, this is the type of behaviour I expect from kids his age at school, though luckily there hasn't been any. But not from a 40 something old in a public place.

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I realize that the loud squeaking coming from him bothered you. In fact, I think even the cashier heard you complaining about it, and she was a few feet away from us. And I couldn't help noticing you giving him a dirty look when he kept jerked his head back repeatedly. I especially am impressed with your sensitive nature when you loudly declared "there's something wrong with this kid"!

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My son's tics got progressively louder after that, and he couldn't wait to get back into the car. Him and I both.

Your insensitive and thoughtless act has done damage to a sensitive young soul. I am very glad that my 6 year old daughter had the sense to scold you and tell you to 'stop being rude'! You see, she understands that when someone is different - we do not point or loudly talk about that difference. She also understands that the person that is different than her, has the same feelings that she does, and therefore she wanted you to stop making her brother feel bad.

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If you had been nicer, or perhaps more sensitive, I could have told you that my son has Tourette's. He has involuntary tics. He squeaks, he grunts and he blinks his eyes a hundred times a minute. He also shrugs his shoulders and leans his head backward.

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These don't usually occur at the same time, and they are usually not loud/pronounced enough for anyone to comment on them. Surpressing a tic only works for a short period of time. And it requires tremendous amount of concentration and effort, time better spent on other things - you know, like being 8 years old. A tic is like a sneeze, you can hold it back for a while, but eventually it has to come out.

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I am mortified at your behaviour, I am amazed that I felt powerless to defend my son - normally I am much more confrontational when I feel strongly about something. I guess you took me off guard.

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I went home and talked to my son about people like you. We both agree that you wouldn't make a very good friend.

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Today I had a glimpse of what life could be like for my son. But I also had a glimpse of the strength that his sister displayed and the grace with which my son handled the situation. I would've burst into tears if I had been 8 and I had a grown up talk about me like that.

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My son is wise beyond his years.

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You however, need to go back to kindergarten.

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I think you may have missed out on the first lesson:

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Treat others like you want to be treated.

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Now that Big Brother's over...

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Yesterday the cleaners got fired, so we all had to take our garbage to the dump ourselves.

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Nothing like trotting across the parking lot in stilletos and a white leaking bag of crap.

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Today the water guy came in an proceeded to remove our water cooler.

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Did I mention we're on well water? Hello!!!

.

Anybody else smell layoffs coming?

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Blogland

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Reposting this for Fned ....

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Blog land. It's a different kind of place.

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For those of you who have recently moved to the neighborhood, welcome. This is really the kind of place most people usually only read about. It's nowhere in particular, but right outside your front door. You can be yourself. Or anyone else for that matter.

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You can be as open or as raw as you wish. You can be as creative or as imaginative as you wish. You can be the person next door, or you can be the one that's unreachable.

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Blog land has rules, as most good lands do. But blogland's rules are a bit sketchy and not as rigid. Most of us who live here are easygoing and there are not a lot of hooligans around. I am only guessing, but if we were to be asked what motivated us to move to blogland, I bet most would say we were just looking for a place to be ourselves .

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Be it fact or fiction, entertaining or dramatic, we all want a piece of our own land, here in blogland.

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So we moved and we built our own little space, eventually we met the neighbours. Like all lands, we'll have many that we instantly click with and like to catch up with every day and some that we don't click with as well, but feel like we have to stop and wave every once in a while or they'll get mad.

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Sometimes we get stuck in a neighbourhood with that one neighbour that nobody likes but everyone sort of puts up with. Probably the lady with the hundred cats, who nobody visits. She'll sometimes come by and you just think to yourself " I bet those cats would leave too, if they weren't locked in"...

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Another common trend in our land is voyeurism. We all have those familiar faces that we see, and start to recognize, but for some reason they never stop to wave or say hi. They just watch us from the car. Then they leave just as quickly as they came, but days later, we spot them again. Makes me wonder, why are they here? Are they scouting the neighbourhood, trying to decide if they want to move there? Or are they simply lost? Should I say hi first?

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I wonder if it's hard being a police officer in blogland. It's really not a very fast paced place. I doubt the officers get to write a lot of tickets for not stopping at the red blog. Or taking off too quick from another one. Indeed it's the kind of place where all happens at your own pace, and on your own time. If you don't have time for it today, blogland waits for your tomorrow.

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Sort of like Florida I would imagine.

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Sometimes it seems like a "masquerade party".... everyone has their own masks on, looking for clues to other's identity. Some are quite cleverly disguised...like the cat lady, (who I bet, if you look closer is probably male) and some not so much.

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After almost a year of being here, I have decided that I am glad I moved here, and have all of you as neighbours. I am happy to come home and catch up with you, learn about your day, and even after I am asleep, it feels good to know that you can still check up on me.

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Yup. I sure do have great neighbours here. I'd lend each of you a cup of sugar anytime.

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Even those of you who never stop and say hi.

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Is it over yet?

I am sure I have mentioned this before. I hate nature. I know a lot of you are going camping these days, happily sleeping outdoors in a tent and cooking weenies over a fire and dousing yourselves with bug spray.

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Not me.

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And this weekend reminded me of why I hate nature so much.

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1. On Friday, I had zero mosquito bites. By Sunday night, after spending Saturday and Sunday outdoors, I have 11 just on my legs. When I was little, my mom used to say they'd bite me because I was so sweet.
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I'm not that sweet at all.

Bugs just suck.

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2. I was at a girlfriend's house in her bathroom upstairs. So I see the shadow of a dragonfly on the window and open the window to flick the screen and make it go away. Well, I forgot that there is no screen and not one but THREE dragonflies flew into the bathroom. I had to flee, slamming the door behind me. I am only hoping they starve or run out of oxygen or something before I have to go back in there. Thank God for multiple bathrooms.

Again, bugs suck.

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3. We are out bbq'ing and I look at our patio set. WTF is that all over the chairs? OMG, it's spider webs, attaching the chairs to each other, and the webs are covered in a combination of teensy little spiders and spider eggs. We had just been sitting on these chairs a few nights before and there was none of this. DIS-gusting.

And, once again, bugs suck.

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4. A bee was in my kitchen. I freaked out. I smashed it against the window with a coupon-envelope-thingee. It fell to the window sill. I smushed it against the window frame with a big glass bottle that's on the sill. Whew, it's dead.
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I leave it there for Frenchie to pick up later. ( i don't really touch bugs in any way, shape or form) and I continue doing the dishes when I hear buzzing. OMG, the thing came back to life! I grab the coupon-envelope-thingee again and hit it, four times, against the window. It appears to be dead, but I do not fall for it this time. I see its little stinger twitching and I know it's trying to reincarnate so it can sting me. So I hit it again three times for good measure, then swipe it into the sink, into the drain and drown it. I run the water for a good 3 minutes, just to be sure. It swirls down the drain, never to be heard from again.

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If a soggy bee comes after me tomorrow, I'm making a movie about it!

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5. The scariest part of the weekend having to do with nature: we were outside golfing on Sunday evening. When we got back, I talked to the neighbors about enjoying the weather. When all of a sudden we hear a rustling noise. Now, I live in the suburbs, but practically the city. We do not have animals of any kind except for squirrels and the occasional chipmunk.

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So I start freaking out. Their boys think it's a racoon, but I think "no way!" We don't have wild animals like racoons and tigers and giraffes around here! Her husband goes inside and gets a flashlight. He shines it toward the bushes and what do we see but a baby bear? Which means, his mother is not far behind.
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Did I mention this is in our back yard?! This cannot be. I decide right then and there, as I barricaded myself in the house, that we need to move someplace less rural.
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Nature sucks.

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I am never going outside again.

Today is not our anniversary. It is not my birthday. It is not even the day after a fight.

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But this is what he wrote:

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Hmmm .... I wonder what he wants?

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